A Tiny Little Issue with Pride

Just a Tiny, Little Issue with Pride

Though I had never really thought of myself as a prideful person – which probably indicates an issue with pride, right off the bat – the Lord has wonderfully, unique ways to reveal the areas of weakness in our lives which can do damage, both to us and to his kingdom work, if left unchecked. 

I have a precious friend of nearly fifty years back in Texas who owns a beautiful home.  Her taste is impeccable and interior decorating has always been her love.  Her formal dining table is always set with china and crystal, looking like a photo shoot for Southern Living.  I have often accused her, teasingly, of setting her table when they moved into the home ten years ago and never cooking a meal since then because nothing is ever out of place.

Even years ago, when our younger son was about three years old, I remember him going into her lovely bathroom and coming back out to ask if he could use it because he had never seen a decorated bathroom before.  Because I did not work outside of our home when our children were small, we did not have pictures on the wall, unless they were the ones the boys drew with crayons before I could get to them.  They were unaware that televisions came in color until they were older; we had one car, which meant getting up early to take Dad to work when we needed the car.  So, when we visited our friends, our sons Scott and Jamie were always in awe of the sheer beauty with which Barbara had decorated their home.

After visiting with Barbara and her husband for dinner one evening, I went home determined to show her that I could keep a house just as clean as she did, cook a meal just as delicious as she had, and be just as gracious as she was.  It became a bit of an obsession with me, as I focused on scrubbing, scouring, dusting, and polishing.  I searched for just the right recipes using ingredients that I was unsure of as how to pronounce.  Finally, I was ready to show her that I could be just as charming a hostess as she.  I gave the house, sparsely furnished as it was, the white glove test.  I sprayed the air, set the table with my best dishes, and prepared a delicious meal.  I dressed my boys in their neatest clothes and put them on their best behavior.

Barbara and I ate lunch, as our sons played with together.  She complimented me on the meal and the house, and, then, she said, “Gerry, could I ask you a question.”  I just knew she was about to ask:  Gerry, how do you do all that you do?  Keep a neat house, mother two boys, serve in your church, and cook such a delicious meal?  About to burst, I responded, “Well, of course.”

She then pointed to the ceiling above our head and said, “What is that?”  As I glanced up, I was horrified to see a red stain from one end our dining ceiling to the other.  I knew exactly what it was – red Kool-Aid!  I just had no idea how long it had been there.  Immediately, I heard Proverbs 16:18 in my heart:  Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.  Needless to say, I spent the afternoon, after she left, on a stepladder with soap and brush, scrubbing the ceiling.

More importantly, though, I was reminded that, just as with the Kool-Aid, we can become so comfortable living with a stain in our life that we stop noticing it.  Often, we are so busy looking at other people that we neglect looking at ourselves.  We become envious, critical, or obsessed about someone else, and we often fail to use the same standard of expectation for ourselves.  I realized that I had become so focused on superficial things about my identity as a perfect wife, homemaker, and mother that I had neglected the real issues of humility, joy, and contentment.

As I went to bed that night, exhausted between the perfect lunch and scrubbing the ceiling, the prayer that I lifted to my Heavenly Father was from Psalm 139:23-24.  Search me, O God, and know my heart:  try me, and know my thoughts:  And see if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.  Lord God, don’t let me walk around so worried and consumed by unimportant things in my life that I might miss the splash of red Kool-Aid which may keep others from seeing Jesus in me.

© 2010 Gerry Sisk

(09/08/10)