Blessing or Burden?

"Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun—all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun."
Ecclesiastes 9:9 (NIV)

Ever had your spouse walk through the door after work and you didn’t even say hello?

This happens more than we’d like to admit. The person we once couldn't wait to see has become background noise. The marriage that started as a fairytale now feels like a civil war.

But Ecclesiastes 9:9 gives us God's design: "Enjoy life with the woman whom you love all the days of your fleeting life which He has given you under the sun; for this is your reward in life." Notice the word “enjoy”. God never intended marriage to be a burden you endure but a blessing you enjoy.

The difference between burden and blessing comes down to one thing: communication. Not just words, but how you connect. King Solomon wrote an entire love song—Song of Solomon—describing four ways to communicate love: talk, time, touch, and thoughtfulness.

Most marriage problems aren't about big issues. They're about small disconnections that compound over time. You stop talking beyond logistics. You stop making time. You stop touching except functionally. You stop being thoughtful.

Tonight when your spouse comes home, walk to the door. Make eye contact. Ask one real question, "What was the hardest part of your day?" Then actually listen for five minutes without offering solutions or looking at your phone.

One small moment of intentional communication can shift a burden back toward blessing.

Prayer: Father, forgive me for treating my marriage like a burden instead of the blessing You designed it to be. I've let communication slide into autopilot. Help me reconnect with my spouse through talk, time, touch, and thoughtfulness. Give me the discipline to put down distractions and truly engage. Restore the joy in this relationship. In Jesus' name, Amen.