Found the Remote

His left arm is under my head, and his right arm embraces me. 
Song of Songs 2:6 (NIV)

A wife lies in bed one night when she feels her husband’s hand caressing her neck. It slides down her side and stops at her knee, as far as he can reach without moving. He scoots closer and does the same on the other side, then stops just as suddenly and pulls away. Delighted, she says, “Honey, that was wonderful. Why did you stop?” He says, “I found the remote.”

King Solomon’s bride describes a very different kind of touch in today’s verse: “His left arm is under my head, and his right arm embraces me” (Song of Songs 2:6, NIV). He’s not reaching past her for something else. This husband is holding her, completely undistracted in the moment.

Most men and women aren’t wired the same way here. A husband’s desire for physical closeness and a wife’s need for simple affection can seem to run on parallel tracks without crossing. She wants to be held and heard. She wants a hand on her shoulder that isn’t asking for anything else. 

He wants sexual affection on all days that start with a T: Thursday, Today and Tomorrow, and Tatterday and Tunday. Wives, I fully understand that sometimes you’re just not in the mood. You also must be sensitive in those times. Ladies, don’t have a headache every night, or if you do, see a neurologist. 

Men, before the television goes on this evening or the phone comes out, put your hand on your wife’s back for no reason at all. Hold her hand as you walk to the car. Sit close on the couch and stay close, even after the show ends.

The best touch in a marriage never reaches past the person to grab something else. It reaches for them and touches their heart in the process.

Prayer: Lord, thank You for the gift of touch. Thank you for my arms that can comfort, encourage, and care for my spouse. I confess, I want them to change and reach for me. I feel weary of trying and trying again. But, Lord, You reach for me again and again. Teach me to love with that kind of compassion. Give me Your heart for my spouse. In Jesus’ name, Amen.