More Than Dying For

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." 
Ephesians 5:25 (NIV)

A husband and wife are swimming at a resort in the Bahamas when suddenly a shark appears. The lifeguard shouts, "Shark! Everybody get out!" The husband panics and takes off for shore, leaving his wife behind. When she finally makes it back, she's livid. "What a terrible thing to do! Don't you remember saying you would face death for me?" He replies, "Yes, but that shark wasn't dead."

Now, facing a shark might sound impossible, but let me tell you what’s even harder. Do you love your wife enough to die to you and live for her? Because if you're going to love your wife the way you ought to love your wife, you've got to die to what you want out of the marriage. You need to start living for what you can give to the marriage.

Ephesians five, Paul posed a significant challenge. Jesus didn't just die for the church. He lives every day to make her holy, to present her radiant and blameless. That's the kind of love Paul commands. It’s agape love that always puts the other person first. It’s not a feeling. It's an act of the will.

Your wife is not there to make you happy. You're there to help her become everything God created her to be. If your wife is not being drawn closer to Jesus by the way you're leading her and loving her, you're not the husband you ought to be.

Tomorrow morning, when you want to sleep in but your wife needs help with the kids, die to your preference. When your evening plans get in the way of her request to talk about her day, die to your agenda. When she needs emotional support but you're exhausted, die to your weariness and give her your full attention.

This daily dying is harder than a one-time heroic act. But it's what transforms a marriage. You nourish her spirit. You cherish her heart. You protect her dignity. You provide for her needs, not because she deserves it, but because Christ loves her through you.

The question isn't whether you'd die for your wife. The question is whether you'll die to yourself today so she can flourish. That's the love that changes everything.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, dying to myself is harder than I want to admit. I want my way, my comfort, my preferences. But you gave Your Son completely for me. Help me love my spouse with that same sacrificial love. When I'm tempted to put myself first, remind me that love is a choice, not a feeling. Give me the strength to die daily to my own needs and instead put theirs first. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.